anger

This is an old blog of mine on a different site, but a nice reminder that anger serves a purpose and can be healthy and empowering. And it too shall pass.

I feel it

My belly is hot with emotion

My face tingles

My hands are shaking

My head spins

My thoughts race

My mouth dries

I'm dizzy

I fear opening my mouth to speak

As all that may come out are screams

Of anger

Betrayal

Pain

Sadness

It grows like a disease

Constantly feeding off of it's self

And it's infectious

It spreads like fire

And it is hard to put out

Have you ever seen the evidence of a forest fire?

It leaves its evidence

In charred ground

Empty space

Death

Blackness

But do you want to know what happens afterwards?

The earth is somehow renewed

And new life begins as soon as the fire is put out

It's a method of encouraging healthy foliage

Sometimes you just have to burn off the old stuff

To find beauty

This is anger to me

A necessary emotion

To burn up all the old

And allow room for the new

So

I will let this burn in me

And when I am able to

And when it is time to

I will put out these flames

And allow new life to begin.

a tuesday blog

this is what is on my mind today.....

is it possible to make a promise
or a commitment
on accident?
without speaking it
or knowing it
until one day you are painfully aware
of the commitments and boundaries that exist
around you and in you
that you didn’t make
but your heart
or your spirit made
without your permission
without even asking you first!!!

this has recently happened to me.
and it actually hurt when the boundaries were crossed
and I didn’t even know they were there.

so, it has me thinking about all promises and commitments we make. Can you really be fully committed to anything if your heart doesn’t first, or at least at some point, make the same promises your head makes and your mouth speaks?

if we can’t actually feel the pain of breaking the promise, then should we have made the promise to begin with? maybe the only real boundaries, promises, and commitments are the ones that are made from way down deep inside of us that we, our physical bodies, don't choose....maybe the real commitment is born from a place that we don't have any logical control over.